But the loss of the sunlight in November is what hits me hard. It makes the days feel never-ending in a weird way. Wake-up in the dark, go home in the dark. Rinse and repeat.
I lose a lot of my freedom outside with the loss of light too. We live in an area where I'd have to drive if I want to run outside after work and, really, that I don't have the energy for that. That would all be okay (see previous paragraph about how I can manage the tread) but with the husband always at home, there is a lose of alone time. It's all so rushed in a way when it's on the tread and noisy. It feels confining during the week that has little to do with the weather. Once we spring back, it feels like taking a deep breath. There is still winter, and in recent years, storms, but there is hope and space.
I think right now that's what I really need: hope. Just a little something that shines light around everything and everyone. Winters are hard and this winter felt and feels particularly hard. I think life feels heavy. Perhaps with the end of the dark days literally, there will be some light days figuratively.