For a Bitter Time

I’m tying to still figure out how I feel about running. I’m finally back to looking forward to running and getting back on track with training and psushing myself. That being said, I’m not sure where my head is totally at with the idea of trying to BQ again and run a marathon. There’s a part of me that is chomping at the bit to get at it again. Then there’s the part of me that think wth, why?

I think I’m also torn between wanting to that and looking to do new things. I do OT, which yes, is not that different, but it takes up a day of a workout unless I want to do double duty (is that too much? I never know...) but also maybe looking into climbing with the husband. But then I think...

Come on. You’ve got to do this.

I ran the turkey trot that I got second in my age group last year (third this year, but (1) I was in fact hung over and (2) it was like 0 outside so...) and during the race I had that conversation with myself of why I was pushing and to just dial it back. And then I had the OTHER thought of get it together and stop feeling sorry for yourself.

Just. Run. Just. Race.

It’ll be over and you’ll feel so good and cool about it all. Which is where the drive to try again comes from and to push myself to that point of both hate and pride with this sport. So... we shall see.

Maybe, as the opening to this post says...

It’s gonna hurt for a bitter time, so bottles up let’s forget tonight.

And do it tomorrow.