For the First Time in a Long Time

I just wanted to share a few more thoughts post providence Marathon because I feel like they are a little bit different than my post Baystate Marathon. After both of my Baystate marathons I had a sense of accomplishment but also a cloud of disappointment. The second one was especially a hard time for me afterwards. It was a hard fought training program, one that had many ups and many downs, and the race itself was the same way. I truly thought I was on the right track and in many ways I was but just a little bit short. During that race I came close to tears when I realize I just couldn’t pull through and upon finishing realizing how close I was and yet how far away I was I thought my heart sing. I wondered where I lost my time and if I could have made it up and settled on the fact that I am not sure where I could have made it up but I am certain that I could have made it up. I was proud of the improvement in my time but super disappointed in the result. And it took a long time to get over that and in many ways I still haven’t gotten over it since I still need to keep running if I ever want to qualify for Boston. After Providence though I have a happier outlook. I think that race took a lot of grits as I explained earlier that I didn’t really focus on before hand. But now upon finishing and thinking back on it and thinking about my time and how I feel couple days after words I am proud of what I did this past Sunday. I think that it was a better showing in many ways in the previous two marathons. I didn’t put in the training but I still had a result that I can be proud of and having run in that weather and just doing what needed to be done now that it has settled in a bit more I’m happy with the experience and how I finish the race. Also unlike after Baystate in which I wondered if I would decide to do a marathon again this was a positive experience in which I am actually looking forward to running a marathon again and looking forward to potentially pushing myself and trying once more for that elusive goal. It makes me look forward to training hard because I see the result of what I consider to be so so training and there is that thought of what could I actually do if I got myself back out there and really focused it’s made me want to focus on other things which I always have on the back burner including but not limited to better nutrition meditation better food etc. As always. Better stretching. So all in all I’m like how my previous post after last year were filled with a better death and a sadness and some regret I don’t feel at this time I feel a sense of accomplishment in a sense of pride which is something that I greatly enjoyed as many people would look forward to the next chapter and just seeing what I decide to do.