Okay let's jump straight to the point: I did not make a qualifying time. My end result was 3:45:25 which is about 5 to 8 minutes to slow at this stage. That being said I am only slightly disappointed. I of course would have much preferred to qualify especially since my husband did in a blindingly fast time of 3:02:30. I am happy for him and I also don't feel as left behind as I worried one of us may have felt if one of us qualified and the other didn't. I think some of this acceptance is for two reasons.
The first is that I have other chances and because I was only off by a margin I feel like this is something that I can do. I feel like I know where that family was (miles 20-26 for sure) and I know I can work on having the strength to get through this last 6 miles by going a little bit longer on the long runs. I know I can adjust my training plan to work a little bit harder and now that I've done the train plan one I can see where the tweaks need to happen so I feel that I can better prepare myself to take off those meds that I need to.
The second reason I have found myself not totally disappointed as I am 99% sure I could not have worked harder than I did yesterday. My training brought me to that point and yes I am sure there is some party minute could've dug deeper at some miles before I cross that finish line but right now in retrospection I am not sure that could've come from. I feel like I gave it pretty much my all and that now I can better comprehend how running a marathon works where mentally my next time I may know where to push or lay off a little bit better but yesterday I feel like I did the races I could do it and I was strategic about it it just turned out those last 6 miles kick me in the butt. And I haven't set myself up to be kicked in the butt as badly as I was then.
That being said my last 6 miles were still mostly under nine minutes and I did not fall apart as badly as I possibly could have. I definitely wanted to but I think the mental fortitude push me through as well as the fact that my body was better trained than maybe I was feeling it was at that time. So all of that is very encouraging. I knew going in I had a mental wherewithal to be able to do this and was wondering if I had the physical wherewithal now I know that I definitely have The mental and can have the physical I just may need to tweak it a little bit more.
And the last tidbit at that I would want to leave with is marathons are damn hard. I knew this going in because I've known enough marathoners and I've run enough to know that writing can be a huge challenge. I will say that this may be the most physically demanding thing I've done short of recovery from my ACL surgeries but that was hurt in a different way. I am proud of everyone who is ever run a marathon and I am proud of myself for finally putting this on the done list. I will also say at one point I did say to myself you make your ACL surgeries and just get your ass in gear. It is kind of nice to have some form of history that puts everything into perspective.
Now the question becomes when will I do this again? I have started to look but I have not finalize anything but expect that there will be another time for this. As for this block I may keep it up just detailing other running adventures such as my 5 mile or at Thanksgiving and my hope to PR and a half marathon in February. For the time being I am going to sit and maybe consider the gym on Wednesday.
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